Be Happy

I'm an emotional person.

Always have been.

I actually like feeling the broad range of emotions; it makes the good emotions that much better.

Mark isn't.

Mark is very level, very steady.

That's one of the many things I love about him.

Scott is a toddler/kid and therefore is emotional.

It might change later but for now we have a lot of fun feeling happy and excited and we are both practicing patience when it's not so happy and exciting.

We have to teach Scott a lot of things that may come naturally to some other children.

We have been working on teaching him to recognize his emotions.

This, I feel, is important when also teaching him about good and bad chooses.

So we often play pretend with our different emotions.

Practicing the look on our face when we are happy vs. sad, things we do when we are mad, and also trying not to get angry.

Scott learns things and they kinda become rules in his brain.

We are so proud of him for understanding what we teach him, it makes teaching him other lessons easier.

But sometimes they back fire.

Like teaching him not to say stupid.

Scott doesn't say it, Mommy and daddy are to ones who get yelled at for saying it.

Mommy also gets told to be happy.

Actually she gets yelled at to be happy.

If I'm tired, "BE HAPPY!"

If I'm bored,  "BE HAPPY!"

If I trip and stub my toe,  "BE HAPPY!"

If I'm debating something with Mark (not arguing, just a friendly debate over shampoo or conditioner being better) we both get the,  "BE HAPPY!"

If I'm watching a movie, like say, Monsters Inc. and it's the end and Sully opens the door all curious like and then you see his face change to complete joy, and yeah, ok, I shed a tear, so what, I'm a sap.

I get a big huge, 

 "BE HAPPY!"

It was really sweet at first.

Scott doesn't want anyone to be anything but happy.

But like I said, I'm an emotional person.

So I hear this all day long.

Guess what, I can't be happy all the time.

So now I get to try to teach him that I can have more than one emotion at a time, like I can be tired and still happy.

This might be harder to correct since the rule is already set in his brain but we are going to try.

For my emotional well being, we are going to try.

This rule is hard for Scott to keep at times too.

After all he's just leaving the toddler years and entering the kid ones and there are a lot of emotions with both.

So we were going to a preschool orientation and he was so very happy to be sitting in the back with his friend, Jade and her mom, Amber.

We all went together since Scott and Jade would be going to the same class.

Scott was already feeling a little on edge since he wasn't allowed to find or play with the big T Rex that he had played with months ago while we were interviewing preschool teachers for him.

Yes, he remembered.

On our way home he wasn't acting quite as happy as he was on our way there.

I had a young womens activity that I was late for so Mark dropped me off first so Mark told me the rest of the story after I got home.

After I was dropped off he then drove to Amber's house to drop them off.

Scott was NOT happy.

Amber is still not accustom to Scott's fits over transitions and people leaving because he has been doing a bit better since we've become friends.

She always tries to console him which is so kind but there's nothing we can really do once they've started except let them run their course.

So after she gives up and goes inside Scott continues to cry in the back.

While crying he starts saying, "I want to be happy" over and over again.

Tell me that doesn't break your heart, if not then I'm pretty sure you're dead.

I was struggling with trying to teach my son that it's ok if mommies aren't happy all the time.

I HATE that I now have to teach my son, my son who I would walk over hot coals and jump off the tallest building for his happiness, I have to teach him that it's ok to be sad.

That it's ok to be hurt.

I mean, he's only 3 years old.

I just want to protect him from pains and hurts because I've felt it and I know how much it sucks.

I thought it was a lesson that I could wait on.

A lesson that I knew but I didn't want him to have to face yet.

A lesson that I know our Heaven'y Father dislikes teaching us the very most too.

That the hard times make us stronger.

Right now he's 3 and his little brain wont understand that.

So I try to teach patience and endurance, not his strong points.

Not my strong points.

But for now,  "BE HAPPY!" will have to do.